[VIDEO] If You're Wondering About… Living As A Trans Person
Throughout the years, The Skin Deep has provided a safe, non-judgmental space for real conversations thanks to the Emmy Award winning {THE AND} project. With over 1000 filmed videos, our library holds a great diversity of interactions from all over the world.
“If you’re wondering about…” is a video series that collects moments about specific topics that were talked about within our deep catalogue of conversations. The vision of {THE AND} is to build a catalogue of humans expressing their experiences and what it means to be in relationship with one another in the 21st Century. We believe there is something to learn from everyone, and that one’s life experience shared can be medicine for another, and vice versa. Thus we are proud to share with you moments pulled from our {THE AND} library that reflect exploration around a particular subject or situation.
In this episode
People share their experiences about undergoing gender transition and what that meant not only for them but their loved ones.
As we explore new perspectives we invite you to step into the emotional space of connection and experience the deeper lessons that shared experiences can afford humanity. To everyone who has participated openly and vulnerably in our project - we appreciate what you have shared with us and hope others do as well.
Video Transcript
0:03
You know, I'm
0:03
hesitant to tell you
0:07
that there's things in my transition
0:11
that are very scary to me.
0:15
And that that may be
0:16
how I feel about my transition today
0:19
might not be the way
0:20
I feel about it tomorrow.
0:23
And
0:28
I'm hesitant to tell you when I'm scared.
0:31
And sometimes it might be
0:34
scared to tell you something.
0:44
If all of our past
0:46
conversations were recorded,
0:47
which one would you most want to revisit
0:50
and listen to and why?
0:51
-listen to again and why?
1:01
Jeez.
1:02
We talk like every day.
1:03
We have so many conversations
1:09
there's a lot to pick from,
1:11
but the only one
1:11
that's like
1:12
coming to my head right now is
1:17
probably a conversation
1:18
we had before we started dating.
1:21
Like officially. When you kind of
1:24
you didn't kind of you like
1:27
came out to me
1:29
about your transition,
1:32
and I was really caught off guard.
1:33
Like, I didn't expect you to come to me
1:35
about that, like out of everybody else.
1:39
So it was a
1:40
I feel like it was a defining moment
1:42
for our relationship, you know, kind of
1:46
that conversation
1:47
took it to the next level
1:49
because I felt like
1:50
you were being vulnerable
1:51
with me for the first time.
1:53
And we had already known each other
1:54
for like seven years.
1:57
Yeah,
1:59
I felt pretty safe telling you that.
2:01
Yeah.
2:01
It felt like the first real conversation
2:03
we ever. - Oh, damn.
2:07
I know that's kind of crazy, but
2:10
I don't think you've ever
2:11
been that vulnerable with me.
2:16
Oh, wow.
2:17
What have you always wanted to tell me
2:18
but never could?
2:22
I tell you like, pretty much everything.
2:25
Yeah, like, I like everything.
2:27
Honestly? - Honestly. - Probably too much.
2:29
What I need to know, basically.
2:31
Sometimes I don't need
2:32
to know everything.
2:33
Sometimes you
2:33
just keep one or two things.
2:34
It's just that comes up.
2:41
Um,
2:43
recently,
2:44
I have been feeling very- like
2:48
feeling a pull towards top surgery
2:50
a little bit.
2:52
Um, but I'm like, you know, I'm
2:54
a pretty indecisive person,
2:56
so, like, apart from these things.
2:58
No, you're pretty decisive about the tattoos.
3:00
Yes.
3:01
I mean, you're-
3:02
I mean, quite a bit.
3:04
But... - You're committed.
3:05
Uh, so, like,
3:07
sometimes I don't like
3:08
telling you things,
3:09
'cause I feel like, I'm
3:09
going to bring you on, like, a
3:11
up and down journey of, like,
3:13
will they, won't they?
3:14
Like, with
3:15
career stuff, like
3:16
going back to school or whatever.
3:17
Like, I'm always just, like,
3:18
bringing you on like, a little, like.
3:20
I know, and I'm excited.
3:21
And then we don't talk about it.
3:24
So I think I want to talk to you
3:27
about that in some ways,
3:31
but I also
3:33
I don't know,
3:34
like, I don't
3:34
I haven't fully formed my...
3:36
- Right. - Relationship, an idea to it,
3:38
so I don't want to bring you into it.
3:39
- Right, okay. Well, good.
3:41
Because I, you know, I'm always here for,
3:45
I know,
3:46
I mean,
3:46
you don't
3:47
I mean,
3:47
you can just bring it up
3:48
and then have me as a sounding board
3:50
because you know I'll tell you how I feel.
3:52
Yeah.
3:52
You know?
3:56
Does it make a difference.
3:57
To you if I am your son or your daughter?
4:00
No,
4:02
absolutely not.
4:04
You becoming trans was very difficult.
4:07
Um,
4:10
because it's a complete
4:13
change of everything.
4:16
You know, your name... to me is you.
4:20
The child
4:21
becomes a different child completely
4:24
at first.
4:25
And it took me about a year
4:32
or two to get over it.
4:36
Where do you think I may fail you?
4:38
Why are you smirking? - Because I think- I'm not smirking.
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